How would you criticise and praise my writing?

The Dari rose over the Veel mountains from my camp, tinting the star fading sky with an ominous reddish-orange. The fire I lit was now departing and leaving behind smouldering embers. Smoke rose from the ruins of the fire, it rose high into the air, soaring over the tall green conifers. My eyes opened, their blue water gazing silently at the fire that lay where my body was fixed, seeing the falling embers vanish into blackened logs. Ash blew towards the east, and I looked to see where they landed. They fell next to the rock that was smothered in moss and antediluvian carvings. I smiled at the icy breeze swaying from the north, from the Veel. I got up then, and destroyed the remaining life of the fire with my scout boots. I walked over to the rock after I packed up all my things and put them in my bag to sit upon it and read The Spine of the North a little more.